NEW COURSE AND THE CRISIS

Summer's over and classes have begun. The new course has been inaugurated and the first students have started to learn English or, in the case of previous years' students, are busy revising what they've learnt so far.

The CRISIS, however, has taken its toll and I thought the cartoon on the left was particularly apt for the occasion! It reads:

We’re sorry… we just can’t afford to send you to the kinds of schools where the guys who wrecked the economy went! )

There are fewer classes; fewer students; fewer grants; less work; less teaching hours. Result: more time for writing. So, I'm taking advantage to put on paper some ideas, revise my work and send copies to book competitions, agents and publishers in the hope that someone will, in the words of ABBA, "take a chance on me"!

Getting a book published is proving to be really difficult. Publishers don't want to take risks on new, unknown writers and prefer to stick to classics and outstanding authors. Unfortunately I'm neither one nor the other; I just write reasonably good (I am told) stories for children and adolescents.

However, time will tell. In the meantime, I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

COMMUNICATING IN ENGLISH – BY PHONE

It is widely accepted that, at an international level, people tend to communicate in English. In this age of mobile phones, this is especially more and more frequent. Could that be the reason why there are so many misunderstandings in the world of international politics? Those who cannot speak and understand this language find it very difficult to progress in their career and run the risk of making fools of themselves.

The following was sent to me recently and appears to be copyright of a certain Morten Ingemann. The document is entitled “communication.jpg”. I have decided not to reproduce the drawings in order to avoid offending anyone. The dialogue, though, is absolutely hilarious and clearly illustrates the dilemma. That particular telephone conversation, in Spanish or French, would have taken a different turn, of course. It would not, however, have been anywhere near as funny!

- Name?
- (Any foreign name will do) (my remark)
- Sex ?
- Three to five times a week.
- No, no… I mean, male or female?
- Male, female. Sometimes camel.
- Holy cow!
- Yes. Cows, sheep, animals in general.
- But isn’t that hostile?
- Horse style, doggy style, any style.
- Oh dear!
- No. no! Deer run too fast.

OF COURSE, IT MIGHT WELL HAVE BEEN ONE OF THOSE TYPICAL UNREQUESTED MARKET RESEARCH CAMPAIGNS DONE BY PHONE, IN WHICH CASE I WOULD HAVE PROBABLY GIVEN VERY SIMILAR ANSWERS!